Saturday, December 08, 2007

Two Bikes

Lets say you have 2 bikes (I know, who only has two bikes? Just bear with me on this). What type of person are you?

Republican:

You have two bikes.
Your neighbor has none.
Too bad for them.

Capitalist (beginner):
You have two bikes.
You sell the one that will make you the most profit.

Capitalist (advanced):
You have two bikes.
You sell one bike and then lease it back to yourself.
You do an IPO on the 2nd bike.
You accidentally crash one of them.
You send out a press release to the analysts stating you have down sized and are reducing expenses.
You become even richer.

Democrat:
You have two bikes.
Your neighbor has none.
You feel guilty for being successful.

Socialist
:
You have two bikes.
The government takes one and gives it your neighbor.
You now ride bikes with your neighbor.

Communist:
You have two bikes.
The government takes both, and then builds a lot of bike routes.
You then wait your turn to ride your bikes.
The bike routes are full of potholes.

Taliban
:
You own all the Trek Madones in Afghanistan (which happens to be two)
You don't ride them because they are made by Evil American Infidels.
You destroy the bikes, and tell the world that the U.S. blew them up when they dropped bombs on a children's hospital.

North Korean
(Kim Jong Il):
You have two bikes.
You are too short to ride them.
You melt them down in your urinium enrichment plant and replace with kids bikes.
You hide them from Hans Blix.

Russian:
You have two bikes.
You drink a bunch of Vodka
You count again and now have 5 bikes.
You drink some more Vodka.
You know have 10 bikes.
The Mafia comes and takes away how many you actually have.

French:
You have two bikes.
You whine because you don't have three.
You take a nap because you are tired.

American:
You have two bikes.
You pay too much in taxes so you have to sell both.
The government then uses that money to buy a third bike for a French person, who doesn't ride it anyway because he is too tired.

On a more personal level

You are Mr. 24.
You have two bikes.
You ride both of them for 12 hours.
You don't stop and ride them for 12 more.

You are G-Ted
You have two bikes.
You have four 29" wheels.

You are Buchanandale

You have two bikes.
Both are Cannondales.

You are boB.
You have two bikes.
You ride both of them fast.

You are EPU
You have two bikes.
You find a naughty little girl.
You trade one for favors.

3 Comments:

Blogger Buchanandale said...

Brilliant!!!!!

6:30 AM  
Blogger Danielle said...

Go EPU! it's about time! Find your naughty little gal!

9:34 AM  
Blogger Happy Mutant said...

buchanandale-Thank you.

danielle-EPU is always on the lookout

8:27 PM  

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